The Demon Barber
by BowserJrKipexx
Summary: Bakura Touzouko comes back to London to seek revenge for what the judge did to him, leaving his wife, Ryou, and his daughter, Amane. He comes along a meat pie shop, owned by Marik Ishtar, a lonely woman who makes the worst meat pies in London. They become close, but Bakura still wants to seek revenge on the judge, and yet, he's still in love with Ryou, thinking she's dead.


Joey stood there at the top of the ship, as it was coursing slowly through the water. He felt cold air blow through the wisps of his blonde hair and on his pale face. A small smile tugged at his lips as he began to sang, "I have sailed the world, beheld its wonders.. From the Dardanelles to the mountains of Peru. But there's no place like London!" Then a gruff british voice interrupted. "No there's no place like London.."

Joey looked beside him and there he was. "Mr. Bakura?" He asked the slightly taller male. "You are young... Life has been kind to you.." Bakura didn't even look at the other. "You will learn.." Joey began to blink his brown eyes in confusion. "..."

"There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and the vermin of the world inhabit it  
and its morals aren't worth what a pin can spit and it goes by the name of London... At the top of the hole sit the privileged few. Making mock of the vermin in the lonely zoo  
turning beauty to filth and greed... I too have sailed the world and seen its wonders, for the cruelty of men is as wondrous as Peru, but there's no place like London!" Bakura grit his teeth as he sang, a devilish look in his brown eyes.

"Mr. Bakura..? Is everything alright? Are you feeling well?" Joey kept asking the other, a tad worried. "Sorry, Joey, But my mind is far from easy.." He looked at the other. "And these very streets are filled with shadows.. Every street.." "Shadows?" A blonde eyebrow perked up. "What do you mean?"

There was a barber and his wife and she was beautiful... a foolish barber and his wife. She was his reason for his life... and she was beautiful, and she was virtuous. And he was naive.." Bakura took a deep breath. "There was another man who saw that she was beautiful... A pious vulture of the law who, with a gesture of his claw, removed the barber from his plate! Then there was nothing but to wait! And she would fall! So soft! So young! So lost and oh, so beautiful!" Bakura's eyes refused to fill with tears as he remember all of those memories. His wife... Ryou. She was the most beautiful girl you'd ever seen.. So was their daughter.

"Oh! The lady, sir.. Did she succumb?" Joey looked concerned for the man. He didn't exactly know what happened.. He lost his wife right? "Oh that was.. Many years ago.." Bakura sung again. "I doubt if.. anyone would know.."

They both got off of the ship, besides each other. Joey decided not to talk about.. That. "Will we see each other again?" He smiled, though Bakura still frowned. "You can visit me if you like. I'd be around Fleet Street.. I wouldn't wander off." He looked at the blonde. Then he started to walk off. "Till again!" Joey called out.

Bakura started to walk down the dark wet streets of London. "There's a hole in the world like a great black pit and it's filled with people who are filled with shit. And the vermin of the world inhabit it.." He sung in a threatening quiet voice.

He kept walking in the streets, passing by passed out bodies on the slipped ground, possibly dead or drunk. He didn't know. He passed by groups of lying people. Shitty shops.. He sighed. "How I love London.." It's better than being locked up to be honest.

He walked slowly to a shop. "Ms.. Ishtar's Meat Pies..?" He said quietly, before he pushed the door open slowly, the ding of knowing someone was entering inside the shop.

There she was. Tan.. Which was odd.. Had messy eyeliner, and her messy curled blonde hair up in pigtails. Eh.. Marik sighed as she chopped meat with a butcher knife, then when she heard that jingle of the bells, her head shot up. She widened her lavender eyes and gasped. "A customer.." As Bakura was about to leave, she hurried and grabbed his shoulders, "Wait what's your rush, what's your hurry? You gave me such a.." She gasped. "Fright, I thought you was a ghost. Sit, sit ya down, sit!" She shoved Bakura shoulders and he forcefully sat down on the chair.

"All I meant is that I haven't seen a customer for weeks! Did you come in for a pie sir?  
Do forgive me if my head's a little vague.." She held her head for a second, then she spot a roach crawling on her counter. "What was that? But you'd think we had the plague." She grabbed the crawling bug and she threw it on the dirty floor, stomping on it. "From the way that people keep avoiding!" She spot another roach. "No you don't!" She slammed her palm on the insect, killing it and dusting her hand off.

This woman was weird.. Bakura thought as he forcefully had to sit in the shop. At least it doesn't smell in here.. "Heaven knows I try, sir! But there's no one comes in even to inhale!" She dropped a pie on a small plate and blew it, amounts of flour and dust coming off of it. "Right you are, sir, would you like a drop of ale?" She slid the plate on the table, Bakura looking hesitantly at it. "Mind you I can hardly blame them! These are probably the worst pies in London. I know why nobody cares to take them! I should know! I make em' but good? No! The worst pies in London... Even that's polite! The worst pies in London!"

Bakura sniffed at it, before looking at it, almost making a face of disgust. It.. Didn't smell that appetizing.. "If you doubt it, take a bite!" Marik sung. Of course... Bakura sniffed at it again, before taking a bite of it.

"Is that just disgusting? You have to concede it! It's nothing but crusting!" Bakura looked at her before quickly spitting it out onto the floor. She grabbed a cup and poured ale in it, before putting it on the table. "Here drink this, you'll need it. The worst pies in London.."

She walked back at her counter, before grabbing a slab of dough."And no wonder with the price of meat.." She started to beat and press on the dough. "What it is when you get it. Never thought I'd live to see the day. Men'd think it was a treat findin' poor animals that are dyin' in the street." She grabbed a rolling pin.

"Mrs. Mooney has a pie shop!" She beat and hit the dough with the rolling pin. "Does a business, but I notice something weird." Two more hits. "Lately, all her neighbors cats have disappeared." Another two beats. "Have to hand it to her!" Hit. "What a course," Hit. "enterprise!" Hit. Bakura raised his finger up, opening his mouth to say something.  
"Poppin' pussies into pies!" Bakura slowly closed his mouth and put his hand down. ".."

"Wouldn't do in my shop!" She turned the pin around and started to roll the now smushed dough. "Just the thought of it's enough to make you sick! And I'm telling you those pussy cats are quick.." She pant. "No denying times is hard, sir!" She rolled the dough on top of the hardened meat pie and pat it down. "Even harder than the worst pies in London. Only lard and nothing more- Is that just revolting? All greasy and gritty?  
It looks like it's molting! And tastes like...well pity. A woman alone..." Bakura looked at his cup of ale and he grabbed it slowly before drinking it and he made a gagging sound, pulling the cup away. "with limited wind.. And the worst pies in London!" Marik sang in a melodious voice, then she rest against the counter. "Ahh.. Sir... Times is hard.. Times is hard!" She spot a roach before grabbed the handle of the rolling pin and she hit the roach before looking at the smushed insect on her pin.

The busty tan female looked at Bakura. "Trust me dear.. It's going to take a whole lot more to wash that taste out.." The pale man looked at the woman before setting his cup down. He did agree with that. The pie.. And the ale tasted like watered up shit. "Come along." She grabbed his boney wrist, before dragging him out of there.


End file.
